|
I Do Not Trust God,
My Soul, Or Myself
Next Focus in Divine
Consciousness
Self-Love
I do not trust God, my Soul, or myself.
3.) THE "DRAMA"
AS IT APPLIES TO THE SET-UP: |
Ashamed |
Betrayed |
Confused |
Hopeless |
Despondent |
Isolated |
Helpless |
Abandoned |
Vile |
Worthless |
Distrustful |
Cheated |
Furious |
Empty |
Terrified |
Condemned |
1.) |
I am an evil, vile sinner. I deserve a life of
pain and suffering. |
2.) |
I am unforgivable, repulsive, and self-destructive. |
3.) |
I can never trust anyone, especially God
and Soul. |
4.) |
I am weak and helpless. |
5.) |
I am utterly alone, isolated, invisible. |
6.) |
I am a lying hypocrite. |
7.) |
My Soul is bad, putrid, and filled with rot.
I am rotten to the core. |
8.) |
No one has ever trusted me. Why should I trust
anyone or anything? |
9.) |
I am despicable, unredeemable, and condemned. |
10.) |
I am unworthy of love.
I am unloved. I cannot love myself. |
11.) |
I am scorned by God. God cannot love me. Why
has God abandoned me? |
12.) |
I am not worthy to love God. |
Worst
End Scenario:
I am a horrible sinner. God
hates me and has deserted me. I will never be forgiven. Even
I have abandoned me. I do not trust myself. I do not trust that
I can be saved; no one can save me. God has abandoned me. My
Soul is desolate,
crying in the wastelands. I can't find my Soul. I do not trust
that I have a Soul. There is no God. God has vanished, never
was, but there is still a Hell.
The only thing I really trust is that I will rot
in Hell and burn for all eternity.
1.) |
Who/What imprinted you? And How? |
1.) |
My mother imprinted me with the belief that I
am unworthy by shaming
and blaming me. |
2.) |
My mother imprinted me with constant fear
by telling me God would punish me. |
3.) |
My mother imprinted me with denying my Truth
by demeaning and invalidating my experiences. |
4.) |
My mother imprinted me with self-hate by constantly
criticizing me. |
5.) |
My parents imprinted me with their belief that
the world is dangerous, and I must not trust anyone out there. |
6.) |
My father imprinted me with feeling empty and
hollow by strangling my hope. |
7.) |
My father imprinted me with a sense of worthlessness
by invalidating my thoughts, feelings, and ideas. |
8.) |
My father imprinted me with the belief that I
am untrustworthy by ridiculing me, and not believing me. |
9.) |
My parents and the church imprinted me with the
belief that I am helpless, powerless, and impotent, by belittling
my actions and decisions. |
10.) |
My church imprinted me with the belief that I
am a rotten sinner by teaching me that I deserve to be punished. |
11.) |
My church imprinted me with being afraid of God
by teaching me that God would never forgive me and that He would
send me to Hell. |
12.) |
God imprinted me with feeling abandoned by never
rescuing me. |
2.) |
The Payoff.
Name it.
Name the Negative Power that feeds the Payoff. |
|
The payoff I get from not trusting God,
my Soul, or myself
is that I do not have to be responsible for my decisions, my
choices, my mistakes, or my life. I can be the victim all my
life. I can blame others, religion, and society for my own faults
and sins.
Why should I take responsibility for anything?
Why should I be held responsible for my fall from the grace of
God? God doesn't follow through on His promises anyway! God
is not omnipotent. My Rage
is omnipotent and is the Negative Power that feeds my Payoff. |
3.) |
What I need to change
inside myself. |
1.) |
I need to change my feelings
of being a dirty rotten sinner into trusting that I am whole
and perfect just the way I am. |
2.) |
I need to change my feelings of unworthiness
by trusting my Authentic
Voice and speaking from the Truth
of my Heart. |
3.) |
I need to change my feelings of being abandoned
by God by trusting that I can take responsibility for my life
choices. |
4.) |
I need to change my feelings of being weak, helpless,
and hopeless by trusting my internal power and wisdom. |
5.) |
I need to change my feelings of Rage
into Self-Love. |
6.) |
I need to change my feelings of shame
and self-criticism into self-forgiveness and trust in my connection
with Soul. |
7.) |
I need to change my feelings of being hollow
and empty by tapping into the wholeness and richness of my Soul. |
8.) |
I need to change my feelings of not trusting
myself, others or God
into placing my trust and faith in myself, my Soul, and God. |
9.) |
I need to change my feelings of resentment into
feelings of trust, acceptance, and love. |
10.) |
I need to change my feelings of self-hate and
disgust into Self-Love, Self-Trust and compassion. |
11.) |
I need to change my feelings of dishonesty and
unfaithfulness into self-assurance and honor. |
12.) |
I need to change my feelings of being unlovable
into trusting that I Am Love. |
1.) |
Like my father I disconnect from Soul. |
2.) |
Like my mother I do not trust that I Am God. |
3.) |
Like my father I am arrogant and deny that I
have faults. I do not trust that I can recover from criticism. |
4.) |
Like my mother I cover my feelings of unworthiness
with deeds of "doing" and accomplishment. I do not
trust anyone to love me just for myself. |
5.) |
Like my father I cannot release control
into trust. |
6.) |
Like my mother I do not trust that I am good,
pure, God-like. |
7.) |
Like my father I am critical and judgmental
of myself and others. I do not trust that other people are honest
with me. |
8.) |
Like my mother I feel unlovable, and I do not
trust that others love me. |
9.) |
Like my mother I believe myself to be less-than.
I do not trust that I will ever be good enough. |
10.) |
Like my mother I blame others for my unhappiness
in life. They can't be trusted not to hurt me. |
11.) |
Like my parents I punish by withholding love
and attention. I do not trust that my feelings will be heard
or honored. |
12.) |
Like my parents I demand perfection from self
and others. I don't trust that anyone else can do it the way
I want it done (the right way!) |
5.) |
Triangulations: |
|
Show at least 3 triangles with you in each of
the three positions: Victim (V), Savior (S), and Persecutor (P). |
1.) |
My mother taught me - "You had better be
good because God is watching". |
2.) |
My father taught me - "After what you've
done, I can never trust you again". |
3.) |
My mother taught me - "I can never trust
you to do it right." |
4.) |
My father taught me - "You'll never change. You did it
wrong again." |
5.) |
My mother taught me - "How can I ever trust
you, when you lie to me". |
6.) |
My father taught me -"I can never trust
you to do it right". |
7.) |
My parents taught me - "There is no one
you can trust outside the family". |
8.) |
My father taught me - "Don't expect God to save you. He can't
be trusted." |
9.) |
My mother taught me - "If you want something
done right, you have to do it yourself". |
10.) |
My church taught me - "Trust in God. Only
He can save you." |
11.) |
My mother taught me - "You're just too big
for your britches. Trust me when I tell you this. It's the truth." |
12.) |
My church taught me - "Trust your mother
and father. They know what's best for you." |
13.) |
My church taught me - "I am an unforgivable
sinner, and cannot be trusted to be next to God". |
14.) |
My parents taught me - "Your father/mother
is going to hear about this. No wonder we can't trust you to
make the right decision." |
15.) |
My church taught me - "I cannot be trusted
to do the right thing, because I am a weak sinner". |
16.) |
My parents taught me - "How could you, after
all I've done for you! Your mother/father was right. You are
not to be trusted." |
|
Symbols
from Soul:
|
The image given from Soul: |
Two huge, golden doors appear. The doors
are radiant, luminous. Two hands extend in front of the doors.
Rays of energy flow from the hands, toward the doors. As the
hands continue to extend upward, the arms and torso of a body
emerge. The torso opens from the Heart
as the doors open. The doors continue to open and then vanish.
A vortex of warm golden energy surrounds, breathes into, and
becomes One with the body. The body transforms into light particles.
The large, golden doors are any barrier, no
matter how beautiful or seductive, no matter how I learned it
or where it came from, between me, my Soul, and God. The extended
hands and arms reaching toward the luminous doors are any request,
thought, or prayer
offered to God, asked in His/Her/It's name. The Light Energy
is God Energy. The opening of the doors is Trusting that God/Soul
is listening, receiving. The body opening from the Heart is Trusting
the connection with Soul, which is God's Love and Energy. Opening
to receive the Love of God/Soul is an act of Trust. Trust has
become All That Is,
so that I now Trust my Self, my Soul, and know God, Which I Am. |
a.) |
I choose to look into my eyes in the mirror,
and lovingly say this mantra aloud, every morning and evening...
"(My name), I Love you and Trust you, just the way
you are." |
b.) |
I choose to share, with 7 different persons this
week, that I am
practicing Self-Love
and Trust. I acknowledge and state, to myself and to others,
that I Trust and Love myself. When I Love me...Trust
comes easily, they are linked. I acknowledge and state, to myself
and to others, that I Trust and Love my Soul, my
radiant Soul. Trust flows from Love. I acknowledge and state
to myself and to others that I Love God, Which I Am. |
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